2 Funny Things Beth Said

Beth, Jason and I went into Nassau Thursday night. It's only the second time we've gone in, so we still don't know our way around that much. I immediately felt at home though, because the cab driver from our first week recognized me and gave me a hearty handshake and shoulder clap. That sense of homecoming quickly dissipated when a man approached us on a dark street and claimed to be a bartender from the ship. He launched into a convoluted story about how his wife lived in the Bahamas and her car broke down on the way back to the ship from visiting his family, and so now he was late for his shift. According to him, the cure-all for his problem was to give him money, but the story was so full of holes (he smelled of beer, wasn't wearing a wedding ring, and the time he said he had to back for work was the time the ship was docking into port) that we quickly made an exit. I once paid forty dollars for a shoeshine in Chicago so I felt it a mark of personal growth that I escaped with my wallet intact. Anyway, this unpleasant experience, plus the fact that Nassau was overrun by recent high school and the strong odor of garbage and urine in some of the alleys caused Beth to dub Nassau “Assau.”

The second funny thing Beth said happened when we were walking by a bar and a guy outside wiggled his nose, placed his finger to his nostril and asked if we were “all set.” We said we were and quickly walked away, aflush with the excitement and seediness of being offered drugs in a foreign country. His question prompted us to come up with other things that he would have wondered if we were “all set” for. The capper was Beth saying, “The opening of “Bewitched” with Nicole Kidman? I can't wait!”

We ended our time in Nassau by stopping by the Hard Rock Café, where Sue and Paul had had dinner with some of the singers and the musician. The Hard Rock Café Nassau really gets the bottom of the barrel with rock memorabilia. Their big attractions are an autographed guitar from Warrant and the Baha Men's Gold Album for “Who Let the Dogs Out?” I quickly forgave them for their lax museum standards when I ate their delicious steak nachos and Hot Fudge Brownie Sundae. That combo might even make a return trip to Nassau worth it.