Grandma Punchers

The other night we were hanging out in the upstairs bar, which is normally a quiet haven from the rest of the ship since most of the passengers don’t know of its existence. Yet that night it had been invaded by a drunk woman in her late teens (minors can drink beer and wine on the ship with signed consent from their parents) who we took a disliking to because she was loudly saying “Hola” to each member of the Phillipino bar staff. She was fairly loud and disruptive for the twenty minutes he was there. The Juggler said something expressing his annoyance with her that she overheard and as she walked by us on the way out, she lifted up the back of her mini-skirt, effectively mooning us since she was wearing a thong. I should say I didn’t hear what the Juggler said that offended her nor did I see the mooning, since my back was to the exit. I just wanted to tell you this part so you’d get as much back story about this girl as possible.

Last night we all found ourselves back in the same bar. She had loved the show, and if she remembered mooning us the night before she didn’t bring it up, but instead came over and drunkenly told us all about herself. We were having a delightful conversation when all of the sudden things took a weird left turn. “I spent last night in the ship’s jail!” she proudly told us. She then showed us a purple land mass of a bruise on the inside of her upper arm. She had been dancing at the disco last night, and her grandmother told her to go home because she was drunk. The girl didn’t want to go, so the grandmother grabbed her arm, which ultimately left the bruise. This did not sit right with the girl at all, so she punched her grandmother. The ship will let you do a lot of things, but it draws the line at grandma punching. Security was called, and she spent the night in the brink. If you’ve ever struggled to say the right thing, you’ll appreciate how difficult it is to respond appropriately to a story about punching your grandmother. As she was leaving, I asked her if things were all right now between her and her grandmother. A momentary look of confusion clouded her face, and then she said, “She gives me money” and walked out the door.