An Astute Psychological Observation Regarding My Moviegoing Habits

After seeing “The Skeleton Key” two weeks ago, Sue observed that after I've seen a bad movie, I spend the next half hour pretending that I'm one of the lead characters. I think this might be how I exorcise the whole experience from my body. After seeing “The Skeleton Key” for example, I spent our lunch at the food court pretending I was a seventy year old Louisiana matriarch, smoking hand rolled cigarettes and telling people that they wouldn't understand the house. I spent the hour after “Hustle and Flow” pretending to sweat profusely, smoke Marlboros, and complain about my ho's. Yesterday we saw “Red Eye.” I walked out of the movie theater and hid behind a wall. When Beth came into my line of vision I shouted “Hey” and threw my water bottle at her, then ran ran as if she were the head of a shady terrorist organization intent on killing my father and the Head of Homeland Security. I didn't have to pretend to smoke because Rachel McAdams didn't smoke in the movie.